Limerick dictionary

It's unfair to belittle or bait
Senior folk who St. Peter await.
Such terms as "old codger,"
"Old git," "coffin-dodger,"
Are ageist and patently grate.
By David Bourke


To my allergist: "Why do I wheeze?
And why do I sniffle and sneeze?"
"A reaction," said he,
"To some sort of a tree
Or to thingies that float on the breeze."
By Meg Beagle

You Are 60% Normal

Blogthings says:

You Are 60% Normal (Really Normal)

Otherwise known as the normal amount of normal You're like most people most of the time But you've got those quirks that make you endearing You're unique, yes... but not frighteningly so!

How Normal Are You?

Racism is silly.

via Upstream: "Almost all Americans who identify themselves as black have white ancestors-the white admixture is about 20%, on average--and many self-designated whites, Hispanics, and others likewise have mixed ancestry. "

Drawn!

Drawn! is a collaborative weblog for illustrators, artists, cartoonists, and anyone who likes to draw. Visit them for a dose of links and creative inspiration.

The 48 Hour Film Project Comes to Greensboro

DATE: July 22-25, 2005

DEADLINE TO ENTER: June 24

The 48 Hour Film Project, the first and biggest of the timed film competitions, brings filmmaking teams together to make a movie from scratch — teams write, shoot, edit and score original music — all in just 48 hours. Our 2005 Tour has begun. This year the 48HFP will visit 30 cities around the world. And Greensboro is gearing up for its second year!

The 48 Hour Film Project comes to Greensboro on the weekend of July 22. Filmmakers from all over the Greensboro area will compete to see who can make the best short film in only 48 hours. The winning film will go up against films from around the world. Enter today! Space is limited.

For more information email Local Producers, Ed Moye and Nisha Coffey

or visit the official website.

Weird bird thing in Greensboro

Since the weather has been warmer, I have found three birds on the sidewalk. I was walking on my lunch hour each time.

The first one was a perfectly intact, beautiful iridescent green and yellow hummingbird. It was lying on the pavement, completely still. I nudged it gently with my foot, because I thought it was fake, but it was real(and dead).

I found another one in a similar position on the sidewalk of Bellemeade Street, when I was walking on my lunch hour a week ago. It was alive and breathing, but very still. Its head would move just a tiny bit, but it didn't fly away when I approached it. I almost stepped on it before I saw it.

Just yesterday, I came across a little gray bird sitting on the sidewalk, in front of my building. The breeze was ruffling its feathers. It appeared to be alive, about to take flight, but as I approached, it didn't move. I could see it breathing. I moved my foot almost to the point of touching it, but it still didn't move.

Coincidence? Or is there an apocalyptic plague attacking birds in Greensboro? Maybe they are zombie-birds. Maybe they are robot-birds sent to monitor my every move.

Thank God I'm not like those guys

"[M]ost of the Christians you see under the canvas roof [of the Church tent] tend to be surly, combative, and have questionable hygiene. But while we always fail to live up to the standard set before us we do tend to be aware of just how profoundly messed up we are. We even, at times, try to listen to what God has called us to do. Sometimes that means we are called to work on a PhD in apologetics, read a Christian classic, or attempt to explain to our fellow man that not all worldviews are equally valid. More often than not, we screw it up. But that's to be expected; this regeneration business is a tediously slow process.

Taking soft jabs at fellow Christians, however, isn't particularly helpful. If your brother or sister is in need of correction then give them a good smack upside the head and point them back to the straight path. Speak up and tell us where we err and what we are doing wrong. All we ask is that you leave the humility-scented incense at home. It already smells bad enough here in the tent. "

--Joe Carter, of the Evangelical Outpost, does A Semi-Charitable Rant on Humility and Heresy.

Are you ready for some hot Jedi vs Sith action?

I have my ticket!!

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith will bow at 3,661 theaters on Thursday, ranking as the 12th widest release of all time with a significant increase over Attack of the Clones' 3,161-theater launch.

via Box Office Mojo

Great Kittie porn

These kittens have nothing to hide. Check out kittenwar.com. May the cutest kitten win!

There Goes The Bride!

There Goes The Bride! is a blog written by a woman who canceled her wedding two weeks before it was to take place, because of "cold feet". She writes all about dealing with the aftermath of such an unpopular decision, including the stupid questions and comments the ignorant masses have. My favorite is the list of 10 non-negotiable points which offers guidance for those who have come down with a nasty case of the jitters. It's a handy guide for anyone who is thinking of getting married, whether you have cold feet or not.

All About Eve (1950) at the Carolina Theatre

All About Eve (1950) will be showing tomorrow night at the Carolina Theatre in Greensboro, NC.

Tuesday, May 17 at 7:30 p.m.

Showered with Oscars, this wonderfully bitchy (and witty) comedy written and directed by Joseph L. Mankiewicz concerns an aging theater star (Bette Davis) whose life is being supplanted by a wolf-in-sheep's-clothing ingénue (Anne Baxter) whom she helped. Also sharing screen time are talented actors George Sanders and Thelma Ritter.

Tickets are $5.00.

All tickets can be purchased by calling the Carolina Theatre Box Office at (336) 333-2605, visiting www.carolinatheatre.com or in person at 310 S. Greene Street in downtown Greensboro, NC.

The Carolina Theatre, 310 S. Greene Street, Greensboro, NC 27401

Revenge of the Sith might be 10th widest release ever

Via Boxoffice Mojo:

Star Wars: the Revenge of the Sith (Fox) will open in approximately 3,700 theatres in the United States. It will have a global launch next weekend, playing everywhere except Japan and South Korea. If the estimate proves accurate, it would be the 10th widest release ever.

For comparison,
- Attack of the Clones opened in 3,161 theaters
Opening Day: $30,141,471 (on a Thurs.)
Four-day bow: $110,169,231

- The Phantom Menace opened in 2,970 theaters
Opening Day: $28,542,349 (on a Wed.)
Five-day bow: $105,661,237

Free Frosty Weekend at Wendy's!

From the official Wendy's Web site:

Participating Wendy's Restaurants are

giving away free, cool and creamy Jr. Frostys. Icy-cold, chocolaty refreshment, absolutely free. No coupon needed. No purchase necessary. Just come in and say "Free Frosty". A "please" would be nice, but not required either.

Available in the US, its territories and select international markets (does not include Canada). At participating Wendy's while supplies last. Limit one per customer. Friday, May 13th through Sunday, May 15th.

UNCG Surplus Sale

Friday, May 13, from 9:00 a.m. to noon, the University of North Carolina at Greensboro's Surplus Property Warehouse is having a surplus sale, free and open to the public.

I have found this sale to be a good place to find furniture; art, classroom, and office supplies; bicycles; computers, peripherals and supplies, and athletic equipment. Generally, they don't sell computers until they are five years old, but the school uses both Apple and IBM-compatible hardware and software.

Check their Web site for terms and conditions of the sale and directions to the warehouse.

Hints:

*Bring plenty of cash.
*Bring a vehicle to haul away your loot.
*They have a limited number of shopping carts.
*Bring a friend with pointy elbows
*Get there early. I've arrived at 8:30 AM, only to be 50th in line.
*They have a limited number of electrical outlets available for testing electronic items.

North Carolina Weiner Roast

BRING YOUR DACHSHUNDS FOR A DOGGONE GOOD TIME!
Sponsored by: Almost Home Dachsund Rescue of North America.

Bring your four- and two-legged family members and friends and join us for the North Carolina Wiener Roast 2005, our third annual picnic!

Games! For children, adults, and dachshunds!
Picnic! Featuring - what else? - HOT DOGS and other goodies [vegetarian option available]
Ice Cream Cart! Stocked with ice cream for doggies too!
Cool stuff for sale! All vendors are donating a portion of their profits to rescue!
Nail Clipping Booth! Staffed by vet techs!
Animal Welfare and Rescue Groups! Visit their booths!

Saturday, May 21, 2005
11 AM to 3 PM
Hester Park shelter #1
Greensboro NC

They have a great Web site:
Almost Home Rescue NC Picnic 2005
email: ncdoxiersq@yahoo.com

Randolph County Paws in the Park

Web site of the Humane Society of Randolph County

Linux replaces Windows for free

Lormalinux is a free Linux distribution.

"Lormalinux is Lorma Colleges' very own Linux Distribution that has been optimized and customized to meet the needs of educational institutions and its students. It is a full-featured Operating System specifically created for ease of installation, ease of use and functionality."

Declare your independence from the Micro$oft nation.

Huh? Corporation

We do stuff.

Dogsplash 2005 **Updated

The Humane Society of Alamance County is sponsoring Dogsplash 2005.

**THIS EVENT IS FROM 2-8 PM TODAY**

Monday May 9, 2005
Burlington Aquatics Center
1333 Overbrook Drive
Burlington, NC

$5.00 per dog. Humans Free.

Rabies tag or certificate required. No dogs in Heat. No aggressive
dogs.

Indoor swimming pool.

Pre-registration not required, but if you call 336-222-5043 you can let
them know you are coming & ask for more directions.

Overbrook drive connects to S. Church St. next to Hams in Burlington. Wendover Ave in Greensboro, turns into Church st., Hwy 70, If you want to drive that way from Greensboro.

Bring your own bathing suit and plenty of towels!!! Humans can get in the pool with their dogs!! The pool has a very very shallow end.

I would love to bring my dog, but she's afraid of water.

A lesson in Thermodynamics

I learned today about a metal alloy that melts in hot water. You can learn more about it here. This cool site is Sci Toys, Science Toys You Can Make With Your Kids.

Skyhoundz is coming to Greensboro!

Date: May 21, 2005 at 2:00 pm

Location: Bark Park at Country Park - Greensboro, NC
3905 Nathanael Greene Drive Greensboro, NC 27455
Park Office: (336) 545-5343


The Bark Park is pleased to announce this Skyhoundz event which
concludes and highlights the festivities of the Dedication / Re-Naming Ceremony.(We're saving the best for last). The gala will kick off at 10:00 and will feature a rabies clinic, flyball demo, games, music, police demo, rescue groups, adoptable doggie fashion show, body-language seminar, obedience demo, agility, vendors, etc...

The Bark Park often receives well over 100 visitors per hour on weekends with nothing going on. With a publicized event, the spectator turnout should be phenomenal.

Getting There: Because the Bark Park is located on the limited access road in Country Park (The road is closed on weekends) Competitors must enter the park at the Orman Road entrance and receive "escort" through the park to the Bark Park.

Crating will be in the fully shaded small dog lot (Lot A) and parking a short distance away. (There MAY be LIMITED parking within Lot A for those who arrive early.)

All Competitors receive a Hyperflite flying disc, certificate of participation, and the first 6 places will receive award plaques. Dogs under 15 pounds may use a smaller disc provided by the handler. For more information about skyhoundz, surf over to Skyhoundz.com or Email Phoenix409@aol.com

5-5-5

Today is 5-5-5, as in "May 5, 2005". That is so cool. Kids born today will have fun filling out forms.

Five is my favorite number.

Viva! el Cinco de Mayo!. Today we celebrate another battle in which the French were defeated. Ha.

MAKE

MAKE

is a quarterly publication from O'Reilly for those who just can't stop tinkering, disassembling, re-creating, and inventing cool new uses for the technology in our lives. It's the first do-it-yourself magazine dedicated to the incorrigible and chronically incurable technology enthusiast in all of us. MAKE celebrates your right to tweak, hack, and bend technology any way you want.

And they have a blog.

"Super Size Me": Morgan Spurlock's Latest Con

by James K. Glassman -- Capitalism Magazine

Article summary: "Super Size Me" is not a serious look at a real health problem. It is, instead, an outrageously dishonest and dangerous piece of self-promotion. Through his antics, Spurlock sends precisely the wrong message. He absolves us of responsibility for our own fitness. We aren't to blame for being fat; big corporations are! And the remedy, he suggests, is to file lawsuits and plead with the Nanny State and the Food Police for protection.

Continue reading

Positively Illogical: The Absurdity of Naturalistic Ethics

Via the evangelical outpost: "This is not to say, of course, that naturalists can't act in ways that are ethically or morally good; they just have no reason for doing so. Perhaps, though, we should be careful about pointing this out. After all, do we really want naturalists to live in a way that would be truly consistent with their beliefs? Given the choice, I'll take an illogical, self-deluded naturalist over a logical, clear-eyed nihilist." Read why

The Time Traveler Convention - May 7, 2005

MIT students students are holding a Time Traveler Convention , in the hopes that someone from the future will show up. Of course, this is ridiculous. Even if they did have a time traveler attend their convention, they wouldn't believe him. We've already seen a visit from at least one time traveler, and they thought he was a fool, and killed him. Still, it's a funny idea for a party.

If you want to attend, here are the details:

The Time Traveler Convention
May 7, 2005, 10:00pm EDT (08 May 2005 02:00:00 UTC)
East Campus Courtyard, MIT
42:21:36.025°N, 71:05:16.332°W
(42.360007,-071.087870 in decimal degrees)

My Linguistic Profile

via Blogthings:

Your Linguistic Profile:

50% General American English

20% Yankee

15% Dixie

15% Upper Midwestern

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?